For those of you that have been following me, reading about me, watching me, have met me, we hang out, we grew up together, we've slept together, we robbed that bank in Lincoln (THEY'LL NEVER GET US ALIVE!!), we found that alien spacecraft that gave us magical powers for a day, and sent us back to 1985 for a week; then you all know that I hate actually taking a serious stance towards anything opinion related. You may or may not have read my other blogs and postings, and should be able to see that.
However, recently I have been seemingly thrown in the mix of a large battle of who's who and what is what in the porniverse. "He's a straight guy taking our money" "He's a gay guy taking our money" "He's fucking my mom" "He can be my Daddy" "He's an alien"... yes, I've heard all of these over the last week and a half regarding me. It really just makes me laugh.
So, with that note, I would like to actually take my stance:
I Fuck, on Film, because I LOVE SEX. I can't get it enough. I can't tell you all enough that SEX IS NOT DIRTY. I mean, dirty sex is awesome. But SEX IS NOT A SHAMEFUL ACT. No matter who it with.
Now, I am as safe as I can be when I have sex, personally, and even more so professionally. I will be addressing this more in a more public and professional forum, for not only the people reading this to hear and see. But, for now, do not think that I do one over the other because I am more shameful of one over the other. I am not. If I was, you can be damn sure that I WOULD NOT BE DOING IT ON FILM AND THE INTERNET FOR ALL TO SEE. Come on now, really? I don't want to say "Look at me, you think that I'm doing this because I have to?"
Now, no matter what I say, or do, or act, or believe, these are my personal opinions and beliefs and convictions. There will always be nay-sayers and critics. I'm sure that this will incite a small amount of commentary on how I was better off and happier fat, voting republican, living next to the Mormon Temple in Denver, molding the youth of America, taking my heroin and drinking myself into oblivion. Because I exhibit all such signs in my performances.
Just as I have my beliefs and opinions on certain subjects, you have yours and I respect that.
I did not start this blog to force my opinions and beliefs on you all.
I started this to be a somewhat comical relief from your day, through various personal stories, experiences, some minor beliefs, as well as the ludicrous overheard commentary and belief of other pertaining to certain subjects. I moved to LA to get out of the small-sheltered-conservative town. In doing so, I was exposed to such comedies of life as the traveling experiences, the segregation of ideals and people because of their personalities and lifestyles. In every other aspect of your day and life, you have some depressing, bullshit glamour story shoved down your throat by media and "News". If I didn't and you didn't believe this, then you wouldn't have commented on everything via twitter and any other social networking site.
Your commentary is what inspired such postings I have made. Yes, I deal a bit personally with traveling, hence my Traveling 101 blogs. But many of my quotes are from fellow travelers. My "deal breaker" list, while yes has a list that I compiled years ago, and personal experiences recently, was also due to an influx of people and their resolutions on Facebook for 2010.
But, now I am rambling, and attempting to justify myself. I know me. I don't care what you assume of me, because 95% of the time, you're fulfilling the "Assume Prophecy". But that is your right to assume certain things, and you're going to assume them regardless of what you don't know. I have never kept anything quiet regarding anything I have done, in my past, with my future, my current projects and my stances and beliefs But it doesn't actually matter what I say, because people will still accuse me and others because of what we do, where we are, what we've done and what all everyone has seen. People are doing the same things to many of my friends in the industry that do not deserve the same negativity and slanderous remarks because of what was heard from others. But regardless, everyone will say what they want, and believe what they will. Unfortunately, I let my ego take over for a day, and that turned into a week of feeding into and playing along with all of the controversy. In all honesty, I should have left well enough alone.
Maybe one of these days I really will "Buckle down" and "Get serious" and give you all an in depth look and bio into me, and my head. But, let's be honest, most of you don't really care, you just want to laugh with me, or at me, but especially cum with me. I'm not saying this to be mean or condescending or uncompassionate. I'm simply stating that the in depth bio to me, is really actually not that interesting and will probably simply bore you all.
And, on that note, I officially announce: I am a Necrobeastipedopheliac. I only get off using a dead kitten.
If you honestly believe that, please remove yourself from society.
Kisses
JB
26 comments:
My apologies, I managed to accidentally delete this before, and your comments were taken with it.
Michael, pete and Jarod, you comments were noted, and with pleasure. Honestly. I don't think less of you for having voiced your opinion. That's what I've always believed in, and I will always stand for.
My sincerest apologies to that.
Michael, you have been noted, I have not ever done anything to intentionally hurt someone. And I have my beliefs on why I feel that a great deal of society has a certain complex regarding the spoken and expressed word. But, you are attempting to use my first few interviews as your ammunition. These were beliefs and experiences from how many years ago now? Those interviews are all at most recent, 2008.
Pete- you have proven my point. Thank you.
Jarod, You may have read my posting out of context if you believe that I had posted this as a slap in the face to my supporters and fans. This is actually more of a Thank You to those that have been able to see though the bullshit that is this debate. Granted, this was done in and through some of my sarcastic tone. My apologies if it was misrepresented. Many other readers have stated the direct opposite of what you had taken from it.
I came here to comment after reading your comments on GayPornTimes. Those comments helped reaffirm my belief that you do value your gay fans. I'm not sure why you and Nash have become a lightening rod for this issue? Most of the criticism I have heard concerning you and your relutance to do certain things can be summed up buy something Jasun revealed - You are ticklish. I get that. I can't stand to be rimmed or have my feet tickled. It is like torture.
Thank you for your posts.
You know my one issue and I won't reiterate it.
re: G4p discussions
You owe no one explanations. You are not one of the assholes you describe on GPT. You are accessible and kind to all of your fans even when some of them do not deserve kindness. You have handled the venom better than I would. I would have been telling the haters to go fuck themselves. Not only have you been remarkably generous with these malcontents, you have done it while suffering from horrendous pain. I have a whole new respect for you.
As a performer, you owe the fans a great performance, and you've never disappointed. You are a first rate performer, and if I had made my way, you would win any award you were up for. Your gay scene performances have turned porn into something beyond just sex. You create scenes that are sensual, playful, romantic, and extremely gay sex positive. That's what I want as a gay man and a gay viewer. That's what gay porn should be about. If some people can't accept that, tell them Chris said to go fuck themselves.
Hey Jeremy this is my first time visiting your blog but I’m a huge fan of yours! I didn’t even realize that you were gay for pay, I actually prefer watching two gay men having sex and I would really like it if there were more gay models today . But I don’t mind since you are a such great performer. I don’t really have a problem with most gay for pay performers, I just don’t like the ones who act like their disgusted by what they are doing on film. There are many performers out here who act like we should all be so lucky to even see them on film. Sometimes when I get a new movie or scene it can really kill the fantasy for me when the model says he’s broke, straight and doing it only for the money. But I don’t get that vibe from you at all, watching you on film you make me believe that the sex you are having is genuine. I really appreciate that sine I’m a young inexperienced gay man and watching porn like the videos you make are really the only way I get off. I love watching videos that show performs with passion .I hope that one day that I can experience some of the enjoyment that you give to your screen partners with some one I meet. So Jeremy keep up the good work keep cranking out the hot vides that make so many of your loyal fans fantasy’s like mine come true!
You're an alien... I knew it!
I KNEW you were here among us. Porno! Of course... the perfect cover. It's so obvious now that you say it ... you can probe asses all day, all night.
Sweet.
LOLOL.... hahaha... freakin' aliens, dude. So awesome....
I’m confused I thought that you weren’t doing bareback porn anymore. I personally don’t have a problem with it but what I don’t understand is that I thought you had sated you would be using condoms from now on. But I noticed you weren’t wearing one in your scene with lovely Rebeca Linares. Nice scene but what gives was it filmed before you made the choice to not go condom less?
Jeremy said he wasn't gay for pay. Well he kind of said it. He's an opportunist more then anything. Nothing wrong with that but that's what it boils down to.
I am really curious what your take will be about using condoms in either side of the industry. I think you will have a very hard time succeeding at that in the straight side of the industry.
You wrote on GPT that you use different/fake names in order to hide what you do from the kids you used to work with. Trust me, more then a few already know. It's not something you can hide these days.
Jeremy Bilding is without doubt a gorgeous looking man; he’s a cerebral kind of guy and very articulate too .He also has his flaws like the rest of us. Nobody is perfect. Nothing is black & white (human, alien or otherwise).I have to confess that originally (from a personality point of view) I thought that Jeremy was a bit cold in bearing, but after reading his blog entries and especially after seeing him handle difficult issues on Twitter with sensitivity, I changed my opinion. I have no clue about his orientation which is first and foremost a matter for him. I do believe that an individual can embrace other lifestyles when exposed to outside influences, especially if they come from a sheltered/provincial background. Jeremy has clearly stated twice that he is not G4P, and my sense is that he is a man of his word. I certainly don’t classify him as completely straight anymore or indeed, completely anything, as I said - nothing is black & white.
All I am concerned about is that he continues to deliver committed, passionate performances in his gay/straight scenes on camera. Having said that I can only vouch for his Jeremy Bilding gay scenes as I have not and would not wish to watch his Ryan Driller ones (GREAT name though Jeremy - he sounds like a character out of Austin Powers!) It seems to me to be an exercise without merit and totally unacceptable for some people to try and bully him into admitting to being of a sexual persuasion that THEY want him to be. We certainly as individuals have no right to preside as judge and jury over another person's lifestyle/choices/actions - that wreaks of facism unless it is in a legitimate court of law.
I think that what is happening here is that some people are blurring the line between fantasy and the real person and projecting their own issues and problems onto Jeremy Bilding. I completely understand why and how this happens and I do empathise, however being so negative is exhausting, very often pointless and ultimately leads to just more unhappiness. I have seen no evidence so far that Jeremy Bilding is anti-gay or disrespects gay people. If I had, you can be sure that I wouldn’t be wasting my time typing this. There are children in Haiti right now having their limbs amputated without anaesthetic and soldiers dying in Afghanistan - is a porn star’s orientation really that important? (no offence, Jeremy).
As far as the G4P debate goes, what I am looking for in my porn first and foremost is chemistry and passion followed by hot men - in that order. I am a gay man through and through ; the only time I exited a vagina was at birth and I‘ve not been back inside one since (although apart from sex I love women)! G4P is not an attractive concept at all in my book because I feel that it is a very negative & destructive force which is currently tearing the industry/performers/fans apart. No performer of any orientation should underestimate the importance of a loyal fan base; ‘The Grabbys’ has got it absolutely right with their slogan: “Fans come first”. Very savvy of them. At the same time the fans have to respect the performer’s boundaries; the relationship can be symbiotic between the two parties if the respect is mutual.
One last important point I’d like to make. I really don’t think that it is helpful when performers denounce their detractors automatically as a ‘Hater’ or a ‘Douche bag’ as a response to criticism. It’s not adult, literate or very helpful. Just because somebody happens to disagree with one’s point of view does not make them a ‘Hater’ by default. If an individual is truly offensive/obnoxious/vile in their criticism there are far better words in the English language to convey the fact and dispense with them. I wish you well Jeremy; I too suffer from migraines and am on daily medication for them. Thanks for reading everyone - nice to speak with you in cyberspace!
CALLUM
Fuck you and your high horse. Maybe you should just shut up and stick to just being pretty for camera.
'I'm sure that this will incite a small amount of commentary on how I was better off and happier fat, voting republican, living next to the Mormon Temple in Denver, molding the youth of America, taking my heroin and drinking myself into oblivion.'
I think your white trash and your post confirms it. This isn't assume prophecy. No your right, you should do gay porn, take heroin and drink yourself into oblivion.
As you put it, " most of you don't really care, you just want to laugh with me, or at me, but especially cum with me." - If this is the case then pack up the blog, and stop doing interviews as if you expect to be a person of interest. Just be the body of someones fantasy and stop clarifying yourself to people, you parasite.
no amount of pr - with that pathetic attempt of no8 campaign is going to change this.
I don't really know which is worst, a queer basher or some g-4-p star, cause frankly there is no difference - it about disenfranchising people. Cause' it isn't okay to be gay. - I encourage your readers or fans to seriously consider this the next time watching a video:
Your definition of 'gay' clearly doesn't include serious loving relationships between two men - its just about the sex, and a disconnect from emotions; and that is what porn is. I will leave on this note, and no longer support any films or production companies you are involved with... and no you aren't the only target; there are plenty of 'straight' gay porn stars to boycott too.
And I also wonder how many straight stars will work with you, without you having to omit your professional background in gay porn - I can tell you right none of those women, who are established firmly in straight porn, would ever want to work with you. If you think otherwise your deluded about this just as mush as your sexuality.
I hope xtube, and pirated video continue the decline of this film industry - which I have come to such disgust and disdain.
Man:I'm not just a spaghettiest.
Reporter: Sir, you like both spaghetti and lasagna?
Man:Yes, I like spaghetti. I've always eaten spaghetti. I've never lied about eating spaghetti.
Reporter:What about lasagna? What do lasagna lovers think about you eating spaghetti?
Man:I've never hidden the fact I eat spaghetti. I've always been honest. When I first started, I maybe, might have said I only like spaghetti, but that was then. A meal is a meal. I want a plate to eat.
Reporter:To clarify, you do eat lasagna?
Man:I eat Italian food. I'm an italianist. I've never lied about eating spaghetti.
Reporter:I'm asking if you eat lasagna.
Man:I will state that I'm not a spaghettiest. The connotation is too negative. I won't be a part of that scene. Too many spaghettiests have no regard for Italian food. That's not me.
Reporter:Again, sir, are you saying you eat lasagna?
Man:I support Italian Foods. I go to cooking shows. I do more for Italian Food than anyone else. I've said that I like spaghetti. I've never said I was into lasagna. I said all those things. I said these things when I first began to eat.
Reporter: So what is your answer about eating lasagna? I'd like the answer sometime this decade since you brought it up.
Man:I'm not going to waste my time defending my eating. You'll believe what you want.
Reporter:But you've said nothing! You've only talked about eating spaghetti.
Man:I've never hidden the fact I eat spaghetti. I've always been honest. I will not keep quiet about anything I've eaten.
Reporter:Sir, you should run for office. You talk a lot but you never answer the question.
Why don't you hold comments for moderation if you're going to just delete any dissenting opinions? And you need to learn the right length for a blog post, no one wants to read ones as long as you post.
Ah, the old "I just love sex" response. It just never gets old, does it, no matter which liar—Wolf Hudson, Nash Lawler, et al—is parroting it.
'I'm simply stating that the in depth bio to me, is really actually not that interesting and will probably simply bore you all. '
-- Try us.
Actually, I'm more interested in this 'boring' stuff then the bravado being a porn actor.
I'm interested in knowing how we are alike, different, and what paths led you to this point in life. I'm interested because I'm sure our lives started in the same manner. But I want to know when the division occurred. I'm interested in understanding you. Vague and indecisive posts or profile interviews just irritate me.
I'm interested in knowing you versus the porn persona.
Jeremy/Ryan Driller this is the type of company your in with:
SANCHEZ RESPONDS (SORT OF)
In a brief Q&A titled "Matt Sanchez Responds (Sort Of)" conducted via email by Joe.My.God, Mr. Sanchez dodged the question of his sexuality ("I'm pretty bad at being gay"), confirms that he is a registered Republican and reveals that he has been in touch with Rich Merritt, whose military service, and career in gay porn as performer Danny Orliss, was revealed upon publication of his 2005 memoir, Secrets of a Gay Marine Porn Star. Matt Sanchez notes that he is also penning a memoir.
"There's something about the beleaguered gay psyche that wants to prove to the world that everyone is just as messed up as they are," he says. "So, they start off with the term hypocrite and work their way backwards looking for signs of deviant behavior in hopes of discovering some type of bastard kinship. That's why I've had the term self-loathing thrown at me so often. The gay community eats its own in a frenzied hope of self-serving fulfillment."
The Matt Sanchez story was a segment on Countdown with Keith Olbermann on MSNBC, Wednesday, March 7. Mr. Sanchez posted another response in a essay at Salon.com: "Left-wing blogs gleefully outed my gay porn past after I criticized antiwar zealots. But the truth has set me free," reads the headline.
He characterizes his time in gay adult as "sort of like being in a cult, and like all followers of a cult, I have a difficult time figuring out when I stopped believing in the party line. I can tell you, though, that by the time I finished my brief tour of the major studios, I was pretty disgusted with myself. It was an emotional low, and the people who surrounded me were like drug dealers interested only in being with the anesthetized in order not to shake off the stupor of being high."
As for his conversion to a conservative ideology, "Just look at what I left, and look at who is attacking me today. Let's face it: Those on the left who now attack me would be defending me if I had espoused liberal causes and spoken out against the Iraq war before I was outed as a pseudo celebrity. They'd be talking about publishing my memoir and putting me on a diversity ticket with Barack Obama. Instead, those who complain about wiretapping reserve the right to pry into my private life and my past for political brownie points."
He also notes that he has been embraced by fellow conservatives. "I am embarrassed to admit that was I worried that my fellow conservatives would distance themselves from me when the news about my film career broke. The opposite has happened. I've been asked to give my point of view, invited to speak at various functions, and invited back on television. My peers on the right have gone out of their way to give me a vote of confidence and avoid a rush to judgment."
"Diabolical liberals are once again showing their disdain for homosexuals, and their lack of love for those who struggle with sexual sin. They are adverse to truth about sexual behavior. And when a sexual sinner is brave enough to say so, liberals become the most homophobic mouth foamers the universe has ever seen."
Mr. Sanchez is singled out for praise because "he stopped having homosexual sex. The ability to 'choose' one's actions particularly as it relates to which gender one has sex with is supposed to be unchangeable in the mind of liberals. The whole 'made that way' argument tends to get decimated when someone like Sanchez simply decides that it is an empty, sad, and destructive life that brings him no joy."
Asshole! Fucking asshole! Your a leech and this guy is a leech. There is no difference between the two of you.
Or how about this g-4-p performer:
Cops Nab Porn Star Suspected in Death of Gay Denver Man
MarcusallenTimothy Boham, a suspect in the shooting death of Denver businessman John "JP" Kelso, was taken into custody Thursday morning just steps away from the Mexico border in Arizona. Boham is a porn actor who goes by the name of Marcus Allen and has acted in several movies (link NSFW) and posed for Playgirl's "Campus Hunks" issue. According to the Denver Post, "When he was approached by customs officers, Boham allegedly told them he was a first- degree murder fugitive out of Denver. The officers arrested Boham, and Denver detectives are making arrangements to have him returned."
Boham was recently hired as a debt collector by the Kelso, who founded Professional Recovery Systems, a Denver collection agency, but any relationship beyond a professional one remains unclear, although Kelso was openly gay.
Boham, who has a 5-year-old daughter, had "numerous girlfriends" according to the Post and once told a downstairs neighbor that he "sanitized" his apartment "by thoroughly scrubbing it because a gay man had lived there previously."
Said the neighbor: "He hated (gays). He hated their lifestyle."
Yet he had no problem being "gay for pay" (link NSFW) in such movies as Falcon Studio's Through the Woods. One talent agency owner told the Post that Boham seemed desperate: "He didn't like people telling him what to do. He seemed like an angry person. His opportunities were tapering off. He got into bloody fistfights. He just had anger issues."
You really think marketing yourself as gay-for-pay, or just 'sexual' makes you appealing but really it disgusts me because I associate this with g-4-p.
Bobby Blake is another gay for pay porn performer who retired, and completely turned his back on the gay community who supported him.
He became a pastor of a church and is now against gay marriage.
There is such a thing as bad attention; and it appears that you don't care what it is just as long as someone is paying attention to you. sad.
Hey man your ego and selfishness leave me speachless.Your either on twitter 24-7 or out
partying with your porn boys.Its all about jeremy bilding.There are folks out there with no
jobs so get overyourself already and quit your bitching
I am not one to ususally post on this issue (gayforpay), although I keep quite abreast with it thanks in no small part to the numerous sites that continue to stir the metaphorical pot. The reason for my lack of participation is that as a philosopher and cultural critic I think closely with Michel Foucault and other anti-essentialists who disregard 'identity' and its' "ghetto-izing" effects in favor of a more historical approach that seeks to think how people may become something different, singular, and new, rather than being the same, in certain positions of oppression, and remaining in those positions.
When brought to bare in the context of sexuality, these thinkers attempt to call into question the idea of some eternal "gayness" which has existed since Plato and the Greeks. Instead of seeking out the conclusive proof of being gay that will justify them to a homophobic society (a "gay gene" for example, or any equivalent), they note how the conversations we all have and have had (and continue to have) regarding 'gender', 'class', 'non-procreative sexual acts', 'the family', 'religion', etc have implicated us all as we grow and change, and will create unique expressions of such conversations.
Rather than being gay/straight/bisexual (on some Kinsey scale from 0-6 with zero being absolutely straight and 6 being absolutely gay), these thinkers hold that rather, we become who we are. Foucault once said regarding being gay, "to be gay is to try and develop a new way of life" (of course he was writing in the 1970's when this was happening). This doesn't mean everything you enjoy erotically (or otherwise) you chose (as you changed), hardly, no one chooses the language they are born into, just as no one chooses the class, or the gender (and the roles put upon them because of that gender), nor even the psycho-sexual dynamics that occur during the most crucial years of early development (i.e. childhood) and which will influence your desires. Yet it does mean that you are always free to enter into new discourses (conversations/experiences, etc.) and become even more whoever you envision for yourself. In this way you may choose your-"self" (not as a pregiven but as a dynamic shifting force).
I write this precisely because it seems as if the entire debate has missed this, and because of your last remarks claiming that "most of you do not care...most want to laugh with me. at me. but especially cum with me." This may be true (you are an icon of desire and pleasure), but by saying this you miss that some will care, that for every "most people" there is always a "some people". Also, most importantly you miss that without your voice (your own story or bio and even current experiences) we all miss out on the opportunity to continue this conversation regarding sexuality (and gayforpay) and hopefully in the future resolve this debate in a progressive and inclusive manner.
Oh and if you wish to discuss any of this further, please feel free to do so, "simonmattew1100@yahoo.com"
Okay Bobby Blake was not gay for pay EVER. He had a number of longterm male partners and if you have ever heard him speak there is no mistaking that he is gay.
He had a book to sell a few years ago and was trying to start a career as a "religous leader". He is against gay marriage and calls it a "white gay agenda" that should tell you all you need to know. His book and observations are scary to say the least and lets just say he hasn't come to grips with who he is.
Matt Sanchez is a pathological liar and sociopath. Once he was outed as a ex gay porn star and prostitute he really went insane. He flat lied to Alan Colmes on the radio about his past. Not to mention the internet stalking and harassment he did to numerous bloggers and late night meltdowns he had on a number of gay oriented websites.
All of that said, I think this discussion has gone from constructive to verging on a flame war. I disagree with Jeremy Bilding's stance (or lack there of) on this issue but some of the comments are a little far reaching. I agree we shouldn't be promoting the closeted performers or ones that show disdain for the community. It's VERY disheartening to read some of the comments on Cody Cummings website. A lot of homophobia coming from GAY MEN. Yes that does confirm to me that some of these guys biggest fans are the self loathing, closeted, and sad. They are the ones putting $$$ in his pocket.
Also I find it disgusting that people continue to support Mark Dalton who is a convicted abuser of women and has done jail time for this crime. Yes it's just porn but MY GOD, there has to be SOME STANDARD.
In the end it is just porn, and you do like to see performers connect and hot guys but at the same time it's just their job whether they are gay, bi, not sure, confused, etc...If you are looking for healthy examples of gay men in affectionate, loving, relationships then you are barking up the wrong tree. It's a fantasy not real life.
Maybe if the gay community stops putting porn stars on pedestals and treating them as if they are superstars or even heroes and having them front and center at pride parades rather then having people of achievement, service, and activism at front and center, then maybe we will be taken serioulsy and our voices heard. As long as some of you continue to put money in the pockets of the performers and studios that support this nonsense we don't have much of leg to stand on.
To the people who said they would no longer buy porn that they feel promotes this way of thinking please consider not investing it in other porn but rather invest in your local GLBT youth center, Trevor Projects, LAMBDA legal services, and other services and organizations that help the community in physical, mental, spirtual and leagl ways, as well as groups that are fighting tooth and nail for are CIVIL RIGHTS and put their asses (and sometimes lives) on the line everyday of their lives.
You know who my hero is? Lt.Daniel Choi. Jeremy Bilding or any other porn star for that matter can't hold Dan's jockstrap! A true hero in more ways then one.
I have to tell you Jeremy, you are smart, hilarious and hot and refreshing. In reference to gay for pay, who gives a crap. If it is hot and gets you off, the actual identifying sexuality is moot. At what point will those persons on the viewing end of porn, realize the fantasy is just that. If you are bothered by how someone identifies themselves, perhaps it is you who must self reflect. There is enough anger and hate already in this world, do not feul the fire and just sit back and relax and enjoy your viewing moments. Don't like it? Don't watch it, don't support the site, don't tell friends. Sexuality is meant to fulfill, please and be enjoyed and does not need to be categorized in any way. If someone or some persons are doing what they are being paid to do, (ie. performing fantasy and good hot sex), stop analyzing and just enjoy.
I have said my piece and will finish with 'Jeremy, keep doing what you are doing because you do it so well."
Steve in Vancouver
"Maybe if the gay community stops putting porn stars on pedestals and treating them as if they are superstars or even heroes and having them front and center at pride parades rather then having people of achievement, service, and activism at front and center, then maybe we will be taken seriously and our voices heard."
@ Anonymous, January 23, 2010:
Oh absolutely - which is why I have a problem with the industry. They participate in events like pride parades and have performers in them who aren't even identifying as gay. That is not pride.
'It's a fantasy not real life.' -- How is this a fantasy? They are having actual sex, and in front of a camera. IT isn't a pictorial, there is penetration. It is sex.
The only star I 'admire'[i use this lightly] is Nick Piston. I don't find him remotely attractive but his stance on porn performers I feel is relative to what people are saying. Nick basically feel that they shouldn't be put on pedestals and look at as role models - For which this community seems to do.
@ Steve in Vancouver: you may be a troll who feels something is better than nothing when it comes to porn or sexual partners; and would rather have scraps off the table then a full meal, but I cannot.
This has been a very emotive and heated debate and difficult for everyone. However, I think that
externalising issues rather than letting them fester underneath like some malignancy is the healthier
option. I do think Jeremy Bilding deserves credit for displaying the comments here (whether negative,
positive or destructive).
One thing I have always found extraordinary is that many people criticise gay men and women on the basis that their orientation is one of choice. In my own experience this is simply not the case. I do believe that we are partly the sum of our life experiences and social environment, one’s family being one’s earliest influence in childhood. We do evolve and change, especially as we are exposed to outside influences, although I don’t believe that they determine one’s sexuality. I was therefore very interested to discover these two statements issued by the Royal College of Psychiatrists and the American Academy of Paediatrics who both appear to be in agreement on the subject. The Royal College Of Psychiatrists states : “It would appear that sexual orientation is biological in nature, determined by a complex interplay of genetic factors and the early uterine environment. Sexual orientation is therefore not a choice” whilst the American Academy of Paediatrics states: “The current literature and most scholars in the field state that one’s sexual orientation is not a choice; that is, individuals do not choose to be homosexual or heterosexual. There is no scientific evidence that abnormal parenting, sexual abuse or other adverse life events influence sexual orientation”. Of course such studies work on an evidential basis, but as far as I am concerned these findings are spot on; I have no idea if a ‘gay gene’ does in fact exist but I have always had the sense that I was ‘born gay‘; at the age of twelve I experienced my
‘internal coming out’ when I realised that I was in fact attracted to the same sex.
I unearthed another piece of the puzzle this past week when I discovered that there are two groups of people referred to in social and medical research known as ‘MSM’ (men who have sex with men) and ‘WSM’ (women who have sex with women).These terms refer to people who engage in sexual activity with others of the same sex regardless of how they identify themselves, as many choose not to accept ‘social identities’ as lesbian, gay or bisexual people. The terms are used to describe these groups for study without needing to consider the issues of self-identity but are seen as problematic because they “ obscure social dimensions of sexuality; undermine the self-labelling of lesbian, gay, and bisexual people; and do not sufficiently describe variations in sexual behaviour". Both ‘MSM’ and ‘WSM’ types are sexually active with each other for sexual pleasure, intimacy and bonding.
It does seem to me that this discussion has opened up a regular can of worms with issues far more reaching and profound than the true nature of Jeremy’s sexuality. I also feel that whilst he appears to be at the epicentre of the (current) storm there are others within the gay porn industry who are sending out a far more negative message with their attitudes and performance.
Sorry, just to clarify my post above - I did in fact mean ‘WSW’ (women who have sex with other women). To be more specific: ‘MSM’ (men who have sex with men) is a term often used by health professionals because it refers to a person’s behaviour and not to their sexual orientation.This is deemed
important because a person’s sexual orientation does not always reflect his behaviour. For example, a gay man might not be having sex with men and a man who identifies as heterosexual might still have sex with men. In the female version the same logic applies.
Gay for pay sucks. Shame on ther gay porn industry. They are worse than straight homophobes. Stupid faggots.
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