The Difference

I may have been born and raised in Littleton, Colorado, but I'd say that I really and truly grew up in the Florida Keys. I had great parents who taught me all the essentials to survive, as well as some of the extras to let me enjoy it. I wouldn't say that I was spoiled materially, but I most certainly was emotionally and personally. 

I was young in Colorado. We all are young, and we constantly mature at different points in our lives. At 17 we can officially see R rated movies, and are typically upper-classmen in our schools. At 18 we are legally recognized as adults amongst US society, and feel that it is our right to live the way we want. At 20 we are no longer teens. At 21 we can do anything, and go anywhere. At 23 we typically are falling into our own lives, no longer dictated by school, training, major milestones, and are ACTUALLY expected to act like a "grown-ass adult". At 23 we are no longer able to really play off the young and inexperienced card, though many people at least 5 years older will hold "only 23" against us. At 25, it's no holds barred. At 25 you can rent a car, you should have voted at least once, and therefore are a "fully functioning" member of society, no matter how burnt out, irresponsible, how many couches you've surfed or any sort of other evasion to the norms of civilization you've played out. 

I crossed all of these milestones while at the camp in Florida. I turned 18 as a participant. I held birthdays 19-25 at the camp as an employee or employer. I watched participants and employees come through the camp and go through similar milestones. I watched and integrated myself as a liaison between the 14-21 year old participants, and the 20-something counselors, and the 25-93 year old Adult "Leaders". (Yes, I put leaders in quotes, and for good reason)

At the camp I was exposed to different cultures, beliefs, ideals and especially experiences. None that I could have experienced and lived through in my Denver settings. If you've ever had the opportunity to not only guide and decide the fate of the President of a company such as Nabisco, or a Senator for their week with you, and remove their phones and watches and make them take the back seat to a 14-16 year old, you would witness the deconstruction of most of the social conditioning we're all used to as well. 

While living on a remote island, and living like Robinson Crusoe or the kids from Lord of the Flies, lacking any electronic, piece of technology, no watches, no running water, just you, a tent, and all the toys to utilize all that the Florida Keys has to offer, certain things come into perspective. That C.E.O. and that Senator are no different than the 14 year old from Dubuque, Iowa. Everyone is trying to survive that next day, and enjoying the waters, the scenery, the fish all the same. It didn't matter that it was noon, especially when you had a 5 foot Black Tip Reef Shark on the end of the fishing line; we would eat when we were tired and hungry. 

I had been taught a quote while I was down there, that my Program Director had passed along year after year, and helped put us all in perspective of what we were doing there. "The Difference Between Ordeal and Adventure, is Attitude". 

However, that quote helps with virtually every aspect of life. I know that to be true, as I have utilized it in everything I do since. Of course it's easy to relay the message when talking about the physical adventure at the camp, kayaking for 5 miles in the ocean, in prime conditions taking only 2-3 hours, but in poor conditions taking up to 8 hours. Keeping a positive mentality is trying, but makes the 8 hours so much easier to deal with. 

When tackling any task before you, think about all of those you have done previously. Were you not able to breeze through the projects and experiences that you were really looking forward to? Then there are the ones that you dread that never seem to end. You get frustrated and upset over stupid little things when your doing something you don't really want to, but you know you have to. But, you seem to lose all track of time, and find yourself at the end of the adventure when you couldn't wait to partake in that activity. 

We go out for the night with friends that we have been looking forward to for either hours or days, and that night seems to all of a sudden come to the end, when you're being kicked out at closing, and everyone is having to leave. But, when you just aren't feeling going out that night, and you begrudgingly tag along because you had made previous promises, you look at your watch hours later, praying "Dear Lord let this be the end of the night." only to discover that 30 minutes have passed since you last looked. 

Finding that one thing that makes the mundane, and the "ordeals" excitable, and changed into an "adventure" will make it easier for you. Maybe that thing is the end, the light at the end of the tunnel. But, knowing that every step you take towards it is going to help. 

I used to feign excitement and enthusiasm with some of my kids at the camp that either I just wasn't feeling, or when I had been going for 2 and a half months, and was ready for a break. In doing so, the energy and enthusiasm from the kids would build, and then in turn, I would become recharged, and before I knew it, we were ending that day, and passing out. 

I still play this game to this day. I will continue to feign energy and enthusiasm, so as to recharge those around me. This is my own way of controlling the chaos. I also always look for the humor in everything. Think about the ironies, the contradictions, the surroundings that are all interacting and intertwining to make where you are the greatest playground, and the most elaborate setting you could even imagine. You're not making any of it up, but when you start to see just how "funny" everything is, it's quite inspiring to keep going with everything. 

So you're having a bad day, so what? Keep dwelling on that and see how better that day gets. Slough it off while watching your surroundings, you'll probably end up seeing some sight-gag that will let you know that you're not alone in the bad day department. Keep an eye out for all of the little things that make life great. You may find yourself seeming laughing at people, but it's not really the person you're laughing at, it's their interaction with the rest of the community that is so off kilter that becomes enlightening. 

For example, you see the homeless guy, roughly 6'4", dressed in a pair of short shorts, that let his frilly thong hand out of the top with the pink tank top that was designed by and for Miley Cyrus. Topped off with a pair of beaten flip flop sandals. Of course, he's being accosted by either the police, or the store owner he's trying to finagle something from. You find yourself laughing at the train wreck before you. But it's not that he's got a style to him that would make a professional stylist vomit, and a blind man just say "no"; just as it's not the fact that he being accosted in such a manner than reminds you of an old cartoon where all you hear is "gumble grumble, arrreahaghghearr" "mahnanamanahamanhamaha" with fists shaking in the air, and people raising themselves on their toes. Ok, actually, that's exactly why you're laughing. This guy is having such a day, that people have resorted to dealing with him as if he were a 1950's cartoon character. It's not him, it's not them, it's life. Welcome to the adventure. 

I make light of a lot of situations, namely to keep everyone on a seemingly same page. Have you ever argued with someone about music? You can't do it. I hate country music, but it's the most popular genre of music on the planet. As a whole, country music has more sales in it's category world wide than any other genre. Obviously people enjoy it. But, as soon as you tell a person that their opinion is wrong, you have now pushed a button that no longer allows for sanity, civility, or coherent thought processing. 

We wonder why religious groups have such a hard time accepting certain ways of life, and particular groups of people, and why there have been wars for 1000's of year. People are taught and ingrained to believe what they will. They will stand for what they believe to be great and what they want to be right. It is their way of life.

I try not to argue with people, ever. This is partially because I'm not confrontational. I don't want to fight, I don't want to have negativity around me. This is also because I am incredibly stubborn, bull headed, prideful, and competitive. I have to win. If I argue with someone, I will never fully admit defeat. I may leave it at "well that's your point of view, and I can appreciate that" but that doesn't mean that I feel you won. I just didn't lose. I mean this in the sense of Lady Gaga, politics, religion, etc. 

But, as I try to keep everything with an open mind and eye, to keep the adventure going, I am also on the belief that "You Can't Take Life Too Seriously, No One Gets Out Alive". I hope by now everyone has realized that I don't mean that negatively, but in an embrace life as it is, and enjoy it! Wasting time on being all too serious where you don't need to be, only makes you miss out on all the greatness that is out there. 

If I make a comment about how I can't stand Lady Gaga Fanatics, I'm not saying I don't like Lady Gaga. I'm tired of her music, and I'm really tired of the people that put her music before their own flesh and blood. But, that's also my thoughts on the subject. Out of the 2 sentences I just wrote, you shouldn't be upset with that remark and or stance, but actually should be laughing at the fact that you can see someone thinking "Lady Gaga concert or birth of my first born child? Shit! Why do I have to choose?!". This is the comedy that is life. 

I can fill up another 3 paragraphs with cliches and quotes that are ridiculous, and that you'll love or hate. But, I've already droned on and on for way too long. So, I sign off with this posting as I really wanted to:

Remember that The Difference Between an Ordeal and an Adventure is Attitude and to take that with the stride that Don't Take Life Too Seriously, No One Gets Out Alive. Simply enjoy it all, laugh with it all. Love  what you want, but try to at least listen to where the others are coming from.